THE GIST IS:
Jack is the dad. She (Sam) pretended it was Ricky's but she's a twat and it's actually Jacks. This mean's he's now got a kid with Roxy, Sam and Ronnies pregs, so both sisters and the cousin too. Even on Jezza Kyle is this rare. Mental. Everyone found out about Stacey not taking her pills. Phil has gone from crack to absolutely loving the playstation. Tracey's working at the chippie (PHEW). Minty thinks Heather wants him to marry her, but she doesn't, so it's fine. Kim (Denise's sis) is capitalising on the demise of the vic and has opened an illegal bar in Patricks front room, much to Denise's chagrin I hasten to add! Sam thinks the baby's ill because it's poo is green, so Charlie, after being at said clandestine bar, takes her barely out of the square before telling her it's really common (I had no idea, I think this is like the doing a poo when you have a baby thing that no-one discusses it but it happens to everyone), he then backs into some boxes or something. Shirl convinces Pat to sell the arches to Phil (????????!?!?!?!?!?!?). Sam wants to give the baby to Jack and Ronnie cos she can't handle it.
So they agree to take him. Charlie, as a result of reversing into some boxes, is getting done for drink driving. Peggy's left the vic to Phil, so within a few hours he goes from Playstation loving crackhead to fucking Alan Sugar. (Why didn't she give it back to Roxy for christ sake!? She just borrowed a few thousand pounds off her it's the least she could flipping do seeing as HER DAD left it to her in the first place, ay carumba!). Ronnie pays Sam off with £30,000 (of Roxy's money OBVIOUSLY), so she'll take the baby away so Ronnie don't have to deal with the whole Jack being a sleaze situ. She agrees BUT THEN Ronnie goes home and the baby's already there. Ha, eat that. Darren wins Jodie back by telling her he got circumsized and DRAWING HER A DIAGRAM. Honestly. Then Sam takes the baby back again, Sam snogs Minty putting him in a dilemma about whether to live his dream of being with Sam or go to the Argy Bargy where he has a dinner date with Hev, and KAT SLATERS BACK. Wearing a wig.